[Essay] Women of the Times

I realized long ago that there are major issues with relations between men and women. Many Westerners say we Chinese love to harbor grudges. This has been my life for twenty years—I won’t change just to cater to others. Yet, it’s quite amusing—those who see the world as their playground are rare. According to popular belief, women have eternal troubles because some men, even when devoted, cannot resist. A woman’s allure is dangerous. A man enchanted by her beauty will inevitably face a dilemma. We age, surrounded by beauty, often entangled in failed affections and the relentless demands of youthful passion. Our comforts create rare conflicts; their absence leads to quiet demise. Women, with unceasing admiration but visible disdain from men, must disguise their inner turmoil. The absence of admirers only reveals vulnerability.

My response, on being urged to follow foreign customs, is resolute. Their concerns are inconsequential to me, and I’ll never lose sleep over their condescension. They do not need to tell me about my own nation—each household struggles. In all aspects of life, there are women and their own stories. Meanwhile, men encounter beautiful women and don’t rejoice—it’s the moneyed who are captivated. The assertion remains, love demands money, but the investment is often lost. Health and wealth are fleeting, beauty is temporary. Yet, the beauty of youth and memory lingers, fading endlessly, in perpetual motion. Abandoning these thoughts was my happiest decision, insisting that ambition overrides disillusionment. Without ambition, one’s heart may crumble quietly like a forgotten drifter. So it is that foreign habits and views may impress us, but I’d choose a life like this again, knowing I’ve stepped into an unfathomable journey of the heart.